In High School, I realized that life was passing me by. I became determined to change things, to find fulfillment.  I looked to people who I felt were successful and started to imitate their ways. I changed the way I walked, I learned the "in" things to say and jokes to tell, and I got myself a girl friend. Still, deep inside me, I knew that I was missing out on something. 

During my Junior year in High School (when I was 16 years old), I began to attend my church youth group's weekly meetings. I first started going because the girls were cute but it was the happiness they had about life and God that kept me coming back. I wanted the fulfillment they had so I started to imitate everything they did, but the harder I tried the more frustrated I became. Nothing seemed to work for me and God still felt as intangible as a cloud in the sky. 

As I listened closer I learned that being a Christian was not so much a matter of doing the do's and not doing the don'ts, but it was Jesus living inside a person and having a relationship with Him. This sounded strange but as days passed I realized I really was missing out. I did not have Jesus in my life, all I knew was I desperately wanted God to change my life. Later I learned that the barrier to having a relationship with God was my stubborn self will. 

During a youth meeting, while two college students were telling stories about God answering prayer, I placed my trust in Jesus, yielding to Him control of my life. I wasn't fully aware of all that I did or all that had happened, but from that point forward I knew I was different inside. It was about two weeks before the emotional high started to settle down.  At times I pondered if this whole thing was for real, but I kept noticing changes in my life and I continued to experience an inner peace I had never known before. 

I realized in my past struggles to change myself in order to be accepted, I had lost track of who I was. Now the fear I had of people rejecting me started to disappear as I came to understand how much Jesus loved and accepted me. I learned and saw that prayer could work, not only in my life but in others lives too. Now I know God is no longer like a cloud in the sky.  He is alive and living in my life.